Living Sacrifices

I was reading this morning in Romans 12. Paul urged the Romans to offer their bodies as "living sacrifices" as a spiritual act of worship. I have pondered over this and to tell you the truth, I have struggled with it too. Giving myself as a living sacrifice is no small order. I believe that some of the painful things I have endured have led me to a deeper relationship with God. Not only have they helped me grow, but they have also displayed Christ's mighty power to others. I have leaned on Him and at times I have thrown myself into His arms and begged Him to carry my burdens for me. He has always been there for me, even in my darkest days. I offered myself to Him as a living sacrifice about 4 1/2 years ago. My life has never been the same. God has blessed me beyond measure and I am so thankful for His grace. Has it been hard? Yes. I could not have done it without Him. Many days He carried me through. I pray that in all thins that Christ is glorified in my life; the good and the unpleasant!

Paul says in 2 Corinthians 6:4-10
Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and sincere love, in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, yet possessing everything.

What are you dealing with? Is it a bad report, hard work, imprisonment or sleepless nights? We as believers already possess Everything. God is faithful and just. Throw yourself into His arms. They are so strong and they can carry you when you can't carry yourself. I know, because I have been there and am there today. I consider myself blessed because of my humble circumstances.

I want to stroll over Heaven with you.

So, I went to sleep last night praying.  I talked to God and told Him that I would love to see my Grant and to hold him.  Well, this falls into that "Be careful what you pray for" cagegory.  Early this morning I drempt of my sweet boy. He was standing in front of me smiling as cute as he could.  I looked at him and said, "Grant, I don't care how big you are now, I'm going to pick you up and squeeze you when I hug you!" I grabbed him and he jumped into my arms and I hugged him so tight for what seemed like an hour.  I could feel his hair on my face.....he was so big and so strong in my arms....I could feel him smiling with me....

I miss my son.  This is just a reality that I live with every day.  I realize that others miss him in the depths of their soul too and that I am not alone.  He was my only son, my first-born child.  He looked like me.  We were connected in such a special way because God blessed us with each other. Every day without him is filled with memories of things we did together. Every milestone that Rebekah achieves makes me think about the time when he did the same thing.  Life is now bittersweet; nothing quite holds the same amount of joy as it used to.  Grant is not here and part of me has died too.  Today I lit a candle in rememberance of him.  Here is a picture of it lit beside a photo of the two of us when Grant was 5 years old.

Today, I'm looking forward to Heaven a little big more.  I miss my little man.  I can't wait to see him when I finally get there.  He was a beautiful blessing from God and I am thankful for every day I had with him.  I only wish I had more.  Please pray for my peace and for my strength today.

This week got stared off with a 4 legged addition that I wasn't expecting.  She is such a little cutie and someone just apparently dropped her off down the road from us.  She is really thin, but cute and playful and LOVES to be petted or fed.  She comes in the house at night and sleeps in our utility room.  I just think she is so sweet, but she needs a new Forever home.  We already have 2 inside dogs and 1 outside to keep up with.  Here is a picture of this sweet girl.  We are calling her Miss Priss for now, becase she is so dainty and crosses her front paws when she lays down. 

Rebekah had her 1st Birthday party this Saturday and we had a great turnout.  We had chili and Elmo cake.  The cake was beautiful and it tasted great.  Rebekah got lots of new clothes, pajamas and a princess piggie bank, a ball tent, Cheerio's and a little stuffed elephant that holds a blankie (just like Rebekah does).  I have to show you a picture of the cake and the princess pig.  I just love them. Thank you Aunt Holly for the Princess Piggie bank and Papaw Ray for the cake!

I thought I would also share a few other things that have been going on with me lately.  I am reading about 5 books (no joke) and trying to dig deeper into my Bible study this year.  I'm going through a 1 year Bible (suggested by my friend Tammy) and bought for me by my precious Mom.  I just can't tell you how much of a blessing my Mom is to me.  We grow closer and closer every day.  I wish I had been wiser in my teenage years and not been so hateful to her.  Sorry Mom :(

I am reading through the Bible and doing a Genesis Bible study by John MacArthur.  So far, it is amazing and I'm really learning a lot.  I'm reading The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie OMartian and Peace With God, The Secret of Happiness by Billy Graham.  Both of them are excellent books.  I just hope I can get through them all this month.  So many things going on....  My next book is going to be by Pastor Greg Laurie (who's ministry I follow regularly and I learn so much from) and it is called Wrestling with God, prayer that never gives up.  I can't wait to hear what he has to say about effective prayer.  But more than just books and studies, God is really working in my life in so many ways.  I feel His closeness and His power in ways I could never have imagined.  When I stopped by a friends house today, I prayed on the way in that they would offer me a cup of coffee.  I know that sounds crazy, but they always have fresh brewed coffee on and the smell just makes me want to hit the closest Starbucks drive in.  Only there is not one close by.  As soon as I got in the house, her husband said, "Hey Shelli, would you like a cup of coffee?"  Ok, now that was an answered prayer, was it not???  God really cares about the small stuff too.

I've been having lots of gut issues since Rebekah was born and the Lord is really leading me to healing through a diet called the GAPS diet.  I am super excited to get started; I've already jumped in a little and can tell a huge difference in the way I feel.  Thank you Jesus for being the Great Physician.

I am getting tired and ready to check into bed.  I will try to post some more of the exciting stuff God is doing here in a day or two.  (Don't hold me to it; I am very busy following around a 1 year old!)